The Private Exchange - What to Get Him...

After six years of marriage, it is easy to see the things that we would have liked to have received, either through our registry, from friends or family. What we did was also include a private gift exchange on our Rehearsal Dinner Evening, after everyone had departed for the evening. Before we said our goodbyes (we wouldn't see one another until the wedding the following day), we exchanged simple gifts - just a little something between us. Below is a "suggestion list" of items compiled by my husband on what he had missed out on that would have been great gifts for the starting young man (I got him #2 in case you're wondering!).

NOTE: Avoid gift cards to the major chains like Menards or Best Buy. Try to be a bit more thoughtful along the lines of what you know about your man. If he's a gamer, feel free to get him a gift card to an EB Games. Make your gift card more selective than the smorgasbord stores that you and him will visit together anyway on every free Saturday for the next five years.

Three basic rules of thumb - think "stainless steel", "meaningful gizmo" and "has very little - if nothing at all - to do with you". This is HIS gift from you. Not YOUR gift to him.

1) Cordless Power Drill - A decent mark too - like a Milwaukee, Bosch or Makita - spend on the best (at least $80) and have it last the five years! You wont think much of it now but years from now, his to-do list will have grown by leaps and bounds. Help him out a little by getting him the right tools for your jobs.

2) Cordless Shaver - Norelco, Braun or Remington will do. Throw in a set of replacement blades for good measure. They're pricey, but after a year or so, he'll have to order them himself anyway.

3) Targeted "Niche" Gift Card - Preferably a brick-and-mortar store (not necessarily the online ones). Let it be something that you both can go to the mall for - you hitting your stores and he visits his specialized store (GAP, EB Games, Sharper Image etc...).

4) Leather Tool Belt / Leather Construction Gloves - My husband waited the full five years to receive his. Trust me, it'll get him started on the right foot, even if he's got two of them! From the smallest to the largest house projects (even if you live in an apartment for the first few years), he'll need something to carry his basic tools around in. Plus it makes him feel empowered to walk around the house with - even if he's just watching the game. The gloves WILL come in handy when it's time to clean out the gutters or the attic.

5) Car Travel Accessories - If your husband is a traveler, public transportation commuter or driving-type of guy, he might appreciate a nice stainless steel thermos for his morning brew. How about a car charger for his iPod or cell phone? What about that Nintendo DS or iPod (see #6).

6) iPod - Current fads call for extreme measures. Fork the $100-$300 for the gizmo (if he doesn't have one already) and watch his eyes light up like an LED display. The 2GB Nano model is sufficient.

7) Running Wear - Whether a runner or not, get him started on his pre-cholesterol issues by enlisting him in runner's club. Get him a comfortable outfit that doesn't match ANYTHING you'll be wearing when you're out running together. A nice pair of cross-country shoes is another nice alternative. You know his shoe size already - he has no idea what yours is. He'll be impressed!

8) Flat Panel Computer Monitor - If your soon-to-be hubbie is a computer junkie and he still operates on one of those clunky, deep-backed CRT monitors, get him a flat panel display and he'll fall in love with you all over again! Consider nothing less than a 19" and he'll thank your for it over and over again. Get the 20"-24" if he's a gamer.

9) Screwdriver Set - Not so much for him, but for all the little things you'll need fixed and / or assembled over the years. A little foreshadowing of things to come...

10) Personalized Man-Items - This could run the gamut with anything that can get his name on it. A coffee mug from his Alma Matter, a stainless steel hunting knife for show or even a desk trinket he can keep at work. Don't include yourself or your initials anywhere on this gift - make it his own! He'll need to be subtly reminded of you for those times that he wants to be alone and away from you. Let this be the gift that brings you back together!